When I was pregnant with Jack there were a lot of times when it was especially hard to be a good mom for Harper. Honestly, I was so stressed and so sad that it was hard to be engaged with her. (Side note- I realize that this might seem strange because of course, you'd think your natural reaction would be to cherish and love on your children even more- which I did sometimes, but until you've walked in these shoes- which I sincerely pray no one else has to do- there is no way to understand. So no judging please). Harper definitely lifted our spirits daily and helped us smile and laugh when I didn't think it was possible. But there were times that I was so unengaged that I probably missed out on things I wish I hadn't. We've also been looking at old pictures of Harper and reminiscing/mourning her baby/toddler days.
But I've been trying to really appreciate the stage she is in now, too. It really is such a fun age and I know I'll be so sad to see THIS stage gone as well (all too soon!). She is at the point where we can have a full conversation, pretty much like any grown up. Sometimes better than some adults! ;-) She also has started telling jokes (though, much like her mother, she usually doesn't remember the punch line). She remembers EVERYTHING (which we have to be super careful with) and often will reminisce with us "When I was a little girl..." or "When I was two...". Often when she says "when I was two" it was something that just happened a week ago! She is also SUPER helpful now, which is awesome. And she loves to help. She begs to help with washing dishes, loves to help with yard work (especially watering plants), and loves to help me "clean" the floors with her brooms and mops. She also just had the stomach bug and as gross as this may be, she now can throw up in the toilet or into a trash can rather than just all over (she almost never gets the stomach bug so maybe this usually happens earlier, who knows!). Today she really wanted to help me disinfect everything, so I gave her a sanitizing wipe and we went to town wiping everything down! How awesome is that? Sick one day then helping to disinfect the next! Another one of my favorite things right now is that Harper still doesn't really care what other people think about her. Oh, she wants her friends to be nice and treat her well but as far as being embarrassed about things we haven't hit that stage yet. Sometimes she won't "perform" for people, but that is fine. Today we were outside and she was riding her bike. At the corner of our street is a raised drainage ditch. She stood on the "stage" and sang "Let It Go" loudly while doing every. single. motion. from the song. It was the sweetest thing to just sit back and appreciate her innocence and confidence and just pure joy that she had.
When I posted on New Years Eve about what a crappy year 2013 had been and how we were making a blessings jar so we could look back on 2014 and really appreciate it I had no idea how much we'd need that or how much worse 2014 would be than 2013. I hope that we can continue to be present and truly appreciate all of the amazing things we have been blessed with. And even if you haven't gone through a crisis, it is just as important for you to appreciate everything you have! Because we aren't guaranteed that it will be here tomorrow!
Here is Harper telling one of her jokes!
